and this doesn't strike you as odd?

Monday, October 30, 2006

i have been rumbled...

At last the truth can be told! A throwaway comment on one of my fave blogs, Conservative Home (see almost passim), has lead to my being outed as:

"a Tory-hating arch-feminist at work"


Now flattered as I am (caution, huge parenthesis rumbling towards the sentence) -

...for goodness’ sake, it makes me sound like Dorthy Parker – I particularly like the 'arch' bit: not good enough for me to be just any old feminist; oh no! And indeed I am shacked up with a woman, dress like a man (well, on a good day) and don't shave my legs. The only thing I could really quibble with is the last bit, given that I have barely done a day's real work in my life, preferring as I do the limp-wristed world of the arts with their wacky notions of free love and socialism....

- I have never had the front (bad, bad, pun) to call myself a feminist of any sort, but now that some Tory with a double-barrelled surname has saved me the trouble, I don't need to.

Should anyone truly without a life wish to read my entirely anodyne pap that prompted double-barrel bloke’s eureka moment, you can go to

http://www.conservativehome.co.uk/

find the bit that says

Sunday 22nd October 2006

click on

4:30pm Seats and Candidates updates:

then (still awake everyone – no talking at the back) find the link for

A-lister George Freeman selected for Mid-Norfolk


ask yourself briefly what on earth you’re doing here…remember - access the comments and try not to yawn (anodyne really is the word – for me at least - not them; in fact, the Tories on there are quite good reading - in a horrifying way; and it's good of them to keep using their mouths and keyboards to remind us just why we love them so. It was also a little shocking that one managed to click on a link - tho' as both regulars will know, in terms of throwing that particular stone, I reside in the tropical house at Kew.

Right - must dash - just off to the blogshop to get meself a new masthead!!!

(licks grubby, arch-feminist chops in expectation)

11 Comments:

  • At 11:31 AM, Anonymous Witchy-woo said…

    You've made it! I am sooooo proud of you!

    Nice new template as well. You'll be joining us all at WP soon ;)

     
  • At 12:38 PM, Blogger simply wondered said…

    thanks, mum
    it is of course Tory blue - and blue for a boy, not nancy girl commie faggot subversive pink
    i wamt a new category of feminist to be - badfem? sadfem? madfem? notfem?

     
  • At 12:36 AM, Blogger stormy said…

    I prefer a unilateral contempt of all political parties. That way, I'm fair.

    So... a wondered witchy offspring eh?

     
  • At 9:52 AM, Blogger Renegade Evolution said…

    That's a brilliant title. Has a lot of "ompf" to it!

     
  • At 2:59 PM, Blogger simply wondered said…

    stormy - i cannot be unilateral in my contempt for them because every time i catch the alleged labour party doing one more thing to cheapen every value i cherish and believe makes us human, i am distracted by the visceral hatred caused by a tory so much as saying good morning. i have no choice. the one just hits me at gut level (pace woody allen).

     
  • At 12:59 AM, Blogger simply wondered said…

    hey renegade (or ms evolution?)
    this is your first comment here |I believe. woohoo, my active readership is up by 33.33%! enjoy your blog and hope you'll keep coming along.
    is omph a typo or an acronym?

     
  • At 6:14 AM, Anonymous witchy-woo said…

    Stop pandering SW.
    It doesn't suit you.

    She's just a woman ffs.

     
  • At 12:25 PM, Blogger simply wondered said…

    my beloved witchers,
    what a week! first I am an arch-feminist, now I am a panda. Pass the celebratory bamboo shoots. (Total diversion: one of my favourite lines in Shakespeare is 'Troilus the first employer of pandas' partly cos I want to know what he used them for - door staff?, partly cos he couldn't have known quite how funny it would one day sound - if you're a bit immature, and partly becuase it was really cool to see Shakespeare slyly popping in a trailer for his next piece when advertising in the elizabethan theatre was limited to potato and tobacco-related products - this obviously predated the jacobean counterblast against the latter; to which he responded with a play featuring loads of witches to annoy the scottish dwarf. A radical to his core!!! Maybe an arch-radical.)....
    'And you're back in the room'... Of course I am pandaing;I hope I panda to you all - there are so few of you and I need all the company I can get. I have so little traffic I'm actually contributing to global cooling.
    Tho now I know she's just a woman I shall attempt to be dismissive of her opinions as behooves this tool of the patriarchy. (the misbegotten product of a witch and the patriarchy...yuk!) Actually, if this blog were any good it might actually garner some male commenters.
    So am I a patriarchal arch-feminist? I must be careful not to disappear in a cloud of contradiction...

     
  • At 3:58 PM, Blogger stormy said…

    SW:
    Unfortunately, I find 'panda' tainted by porn these days... you know, the blog of similar name.

    (Cue the scarey, ghosty music, wooo-hooo)
    If you join 'us' over at WP, you can amuse yourself looking at the blog stats (I do!).

    I've found that only about 1-3% of visit(ors) results in a comment. But then, Stormyblog runs a 'maximum security blog' in that commentors must have a WP account to leave a comment.

    WP has many more settings as well. Yes, you hear the news first, Stormy has just come out as a Nerd.
    *sigh* But then most of you guessed it anyway.

     
  • At 11:23 PM, Blogger simply wondered said…

    I thought panda was (wait for it) gon(e)...
    oh excuse my sides splitting - for some it's unconvincing porn; for me it's weak puns. I'm ashamed but I'm a man, I'm weak and it's a victimless crime - or is it???

    "But then most of you guessed it anyway" - err, stormy? You do realise it's basically only us four. However many comforting stats you and the witch offer me about only 0.3 percent of people who think you are God have the wit to get a comment past word verification - or are literate (which makes me feel so much better), (do you realise that would mean that reclusive leftist has most of China clicking in on a regular basis) this remains a blog of calm and privacy for those of us too tired to think hard, or 'me' as they are popularly known. It requires a password only to get out, it is soon to be declared a SSSI, it is resolutely unpopular. And I miss 'Gardeners' World' to write it.
    We are none of us worthy.

     
  • At 1:08 AM, Blogger stormy said…

    "I thought panda was (wait for it) gon(e)..."
    I could see that coming - but laughed anyway. It could also be ... pandaring to the patriarchy?

    "only 0.3 percent of people who think you are God have the wit to get a comment past word verification - or are literate"
    Not sure that I 'installed the upgrade' to God. Let me check my omnipotent status ... nah, seems I only upgraded to AnnoyingWhinneyBitch 1.3. Oh well, it'll have to do.

    "reclusive leftist has most of China clicking in on a regular basis"
    I knew I should have said 'yes' to having the asian character set installed.

    "It requires a password only to get out"
    Help! *gulp*

    ---

    Now get your Wondered butt over to WP! It's shiney. I like shiney. See how something shiney distracts me ...
    *whispers* "join us, join us"
    I'm sure there is a suitable template for 'madfem-sadfem' whatever. I'm with you on the non-pink thing. I have no intention of 'reclaiming pink'. The Cloud (mmm, that sounds impressive) is a purple freak from wayback - my love affair with purple started in the late sixties to current day and never abated.

    ps - I was very young in the sixties, but always a weirdo.

     

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